Mom, dad... could you repeat that?!

[Toecutter]

My father tries to give me advice about working on my car, telling me I'm "doing it all wrong!". Well, he tells me to do something, so I do it. He comes back about five minutes later, and asks "What the hell are you donig?" I tell him "You told me to do this!" His reply: "No I didn't!"

When he gets really angry, he doesn't stop to think. When I was working on the brakes on my Camaro, I had some trouble getting the brake lines threaded into the master cylinder. So, what does the jackass do? He starts bending the lines by hand, which can kink or crack them (leaving me with air in the lines, if not a life-threatening brake fluid leak).

What's really entertaining, though, is when I finally finish putting the car back together, and resort to take the thing to a shop (because my parents don't even want me to change the engine oil by myself, which I do anyway!), and my father finally gives me some useful advice. I ask him "Why didn't you tell me that in the first place?" His response: "You didn't ask!"

These are the same dumbasses who can't even change an air filter (my dad used to work on our cars, but could barely do the basics, and gave that up when he had enough money to just let the cars fall apart, and buy a new one because "the other one's a piece of crap").

[Nemoxs]

My father left me when I was about 2 months old...

He came back about 4 months ago, and wanted to do all that crazy shit...

He wanted to play baseball and some shit or something, it's crazy...

[Anime Jedi]

I just remembered one of the funniest things I ever heard. It was by my grandfather. He's Chinese, and moved straight from Hong Kong. But when it comes to driving, he's totally harsh against Chinese drivers. I don't know about you, but it's definitely funny watching his say things like "Look at these dumb Chinese drivers! They should learn how to drive. Or go back to Hong Kong!". I'm sure he sees the irony, but it's worth a good laugh anyways. lol

[El Banana]

My grandmother is...

Not the nicest person, shes a tough pill to swallow.. I'm actually scared to go and spend time with her... she scares the CRAP outta me.

My grandmother kicked my ass once. She threw me against a wall corner... luckily I didn't split my head open. I was like 5, okay?
She also drove and regained control of her car, after it accidentally smacked against a sidewalk, tilting sideways and driving on two wheels (I was there as well). The car skidded to a stop, righ in front of a Gas Station.

[Nemoxs]

My grandmother is...

Not the nicest person, shes a tough pill to swallow.. I'm actually scared to go and spend time with her... she scares the CRAP outta me.

My grandmother kicked my ass once. She threw me against a wall corner... luckily I didn't split my head open. I was like 5, okay?
She also drove and regained control of her car, after it accidentally smacked against a sidewalk, tilting sideways and driving on two wheels (I was there as well). The car skidded to a stop, righ in front of a Gas Station.

You lucky bastard

[hyperchica11]

She also drove and regained control of her car, after it accidentally smacked against a sidewalk, tilting sideways and driving on two wheels (I was there as well). The car skidded to a stop, righ in front of a Gas Station.

My great grandma was really funny... when she was really old, she got this sports car, and she'd drive around in it, and yell at people out the window. She lived in Pasadena. She was the real terror of Colorado Blvd.

My grandma's the same way. She drives like a racecar driver. I love driving with her. When i drive, she always tells me to pull over, because i'm going too slow for a residential street (when i'm going 40, which is waaaay too fast to start with). I don't pull over though.

The funny thing is, she's become the new Terror of Colorado Blvd.

oh, btw, a few years after great grandma got her sports car, the song "Little Old Lady from Pasadena" came out. I swear that was about her.

[Nemoxs]

She also drove and regained control of her car, after it accidentally smacked against a sidewalk, tilting sideways and driving on two wheels (I was there as well). The car skidded to a stop, righ in front of a Gas Station.

My great grandma was really funny... when she was really old, she got this sports car, and she'd drive around in it, and yell at people out the window. She lived in Pasadena. She was the real terror of Colorado Blvd.

My grandma's the same way. She drives like a racecar driver. I love driving with her. When i drive, she always tells me to pull over, because i'm going too slow for a residential street (when i'm going 40, which is waaaay too fast to start with). I don't pull over though.

The funny thing is, she's become the new Terror of Colorado Blvd.

oh, btw, a few years after great grandma got her sports car, the song "Little Old Lady from Pasadena" came out. I swear that was about her.

My friends grandmother had a covertiable (an 86' labaron I think)and...

She would go around saying,

"YO WHATS UP MY NIG$$#@S"

it was funny cause she had got it off watching old tv and stuff... and like... when she saw friday she started doing all that stuff,

Like ever see an 80 year old lady flippin' the bird and wearin' pants with boxets down on her hips.. no? good dont.

[TallonKarrde23]

She also drove and regained control of her car, after it accidentally smacked against a sidewalk, tilting sideways and driving on two wheels (I was there as well). The car skidded to a stop, righ in front of a Gas Station.

My great grandma was really funny... when she was really old, she got this sports car, and she'd drive around in it, and yell at people out the window. She lived in Pasadena. She was the real terror of Colorado Blvd.

My grandma's the same way. She drives like a racecar driver. I love driving with her. When i drive, she always tells me to pull over, because i'm going too slow for a residential street (when i'm going 40, which is waaaay too fast to start with). I don't pull over though.

The funny thing is, she's become the new Terror of Colorado Blvd.

oh, btw, a few years after great grandma got her sports car, the song "Little Old Lady from Pasadena" came out. I swear that was about her.

My friends grandmother had a covertiable (an 86' labaron I think)and...

She would go around saying,

"YO WHATS UP MY NIG$$#@S"

it was funny cause she had got it off watching old tv and stuff... and like... when she saw friday she started doing all that stuff,

Like ever see an 80 year old lady flippin' the bird and wearin' pants with boxets down on her hips.. no? good dont.

as long as you dont live in SoCal she should be alright...but if she does then im suprised she hasnt been shot yet --;

[Nemoxs]

She also drove and regained control of her car, after it accidentally smacked against a sidewalk, tilting sideways and driving on two wheels (I was there as well). The car skidded to a stop, righ in front of a Gas Station.

My great grandma was really funny... when she was really old, she got this sports car, and she'd drive around in it, and yell at people out the window. She lived in Pasadena. She was the real terror of Colorado Blvd.

My grandma's the same way. She drives like a racecar driver. I love driving with her. When i drive, she always tells me to pull over, because i'm going too slow for a residential street (when i'm going 40, which is waaaay too fast to start with). I don't pull over though.

The funny thing is, she's become the new Terror of Colorado Blvd.

oh, btw, a few years after great grandma got her sports car, the song "Little Old Lady from Pasadena" came out. I swear that was about her.

My friends grandmother had a covertiable (an 86' labaron I think)and...

She would go around saying,

"YO WHATS UP MY NIG$$#@S"

it was funny cause she had got it off watching old tv and stuff... and like... when she saw friday she started doing all that stuff,

Like ever see an 80 year old lady flippin' the bird and wearin' pants with boxets down on her hips.. no? good dont.

as long as you dont live in SoCal she should be alright...but if she does then im suprised she hasnt been shot yet --;

I lived in Sarcrimento when I had this friend..

It was quite teh funny to watch her drive around with 20's on her car and a 40 in ehr hand XD..

I mean, this old lady, NO ONE would shoot at, even the gang members just laughed it off,

She had bling bling and shit, she would crack you up.

best line evar said b an 80 year old lady,

"My home frys and I are goin' down to the peer to shoot sum shit"

[TallonKarrde23]

She also drove and regained control of her car, after it accidentally smacked against a sidewalk, tilting sideways and driving on two wheels (I was there as well). The car skidded to a stop, righ in front of a Gas Station.

My great grandma was really funny... when she was really old, she got this sports car, and she'd drive around in it, and yell at people out the window. She lived in Pasadena. She was the real terror of Colorado Blvd.

My grandma's the same way. She drives like a racecar driver. I love driving with her. When i drive, she always tells me to pull over, because i'm going too slow for a residential street (when i'm going 40, which is waaaay too fast to start with). I don't pull over though.

The funny thing is, she's become the new Terror of Colorado Blvd.

oh, btw, a few years after great grandma got her sports car, the song "Little Old Lady from Pasadena" came out. I swear that was about her.

My friends grandmother had a covertiable (an 86' labaron I think)and...

She would go around saying,

"YO WHATS UP MY NIG$$#@S"

it was funny cause she had got it off watching old tv and stuff... and like... when she saw friday she started doing all that stuff,

Like ever see an 80 year old lady flippin' the bird and wearin' pants with boxets down on her hips.. no? good dont.

as long as you dont live in SoCal she should be alright...but if she does then im suprised she hasnt been shot yet --;

I lived in Sarcrimento when I had this friend..

It was quite teh funny to watch her drive around with 20's on her car and a 40 in ehr hand XD..

I mean, this old lady, NO ONE would shoot at, even the gang members just laughed it off,

She had bling bling and shit, she would crack you up.

best line evar said b an 80 year old lady,

"My home frys and I are goin' down to the peer to shoot sum shit"

OMG TEH QUOTE BAWX IS LAYREG. --; lol, yeah i suppose they would laugh at it too, i forget that these people are old lol.